HAS THIS EVER HAPPENED TO YOU?

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SEVEN YEARS ON

I was in New York City on 9/11. I had just started a new job at VH1, and there was an area on our floor where there were about 15 tvs, all tuned to different channels. Once the first plane hit, we saw everything as it happened.

No one knew what to do at first: but once the second plane hit, it was clear it wasn't an accident. Do you stay at work and keep trying to make entertainment? No. Do you try to go home? Stay in the city?

I couldn't get through to my girlfriend (now my wife). She's a teacher: I was worried how much information would get to her, how they were going to deal with the children, and I knew she'd be thinking about me. I did get through to my dad, who did call her and let her know I was ok. I wondered about her brother: a New York City firefighter, and hoped that he was not in the thick of things, knowing that he, like other first responders, wouldn't hesitate to throw himself into serious harm's way if he had to.

A dear friend of my family lives downtown with her husband: she was working from home at the time, and I called her and asked if I could come over: I didn't really want to try to take a bridge or tunnel home. Her husband worked in New Jersey, and we weren't sure he'd be able to get home.

I started walking downtown: I was either wearing shoes or Doc Martens. I was walking downtown - exactly against traffic. It looked like a movie scene. It was a beautiful day, weather wise, but you could see the smoke columns in the background, and everyone was walking, some running, towards me. I stopped at a shoe store and bought a pair of sneakers. It struck me as an odd thing to be doing, but I thought I may actually end up walking home to New Jersey.

Everyone was in shock: sidewalk restaurants were booked. So waiters, cooks, other restaurant workers were in business as usual mode.

My friend's husband somehow got home, I forgot how. It was his birthday. I ended up sleeping over. I remember one of my friend's friends had a cousin who was missing. I don't think they ever heard from him after that.

Another of our parents' mutual friends called us: she had a friend from Ohio whose daughter was in New York City for the first time, and was obviously terrified. She asked if I could help them back to my hometown the next morning. She and her friend were in the city on vacation, and their flight home wasn't for a few more days, but she wanted to get home to her husband and kids asap. So, I took them in the PATH train, to the NJ Transit train, and my mom's friend took her to a car rental place where they got a car for the long ride home. It turned out that the girl's husband is a rabbi, and she told me that for my good deeds, I never need to go to temple again, which I remembered and took seriously. I've cashed that in on the high holidays a few times.

I remember being so happy to see my girlfriend the next day. "I'm definitely marrying her," I thought to myself.

In the weeks that followed, it was hard to get motivated to move on. For everyone. But it did strike me that people, especially Americans, especially New Yorkers, showed their best side - I remember reading that the crime rate was almost non-existent for a while after 9/11. I remember worrying a lot: my aforementioned girlfriend's brother (now my brother-in-law) the New York City firefighter spent a lot of time working at Ground Zero. (I didn't know it at the time, but my cousin actually had a meeting scheduled in the Twin Towers for 9/11, but it got cancelled the day before).

In the years since, it has struck me as more than ironic - much worse than just "ironic," actually - that the fear-mongering politicians who use 9/11 to further their agenda aren't the ones that New Yorkers tend to vote for. Go figure.

I wonder how people, both in New York and in other parts of the country, were actually affected by 9/11. I mean, what changed about them for good? In my case, it really led me to be more thankful for the positive things in my life, something I still try to remind myself of as often as I can.

YES WE CAN!

I feel lucky to be able to experience the historic moment of tonight's acceptance speech by Barack Obama. It was a perfect speech: it was as inspiring as his speech at the DNC four years ago, but it also addressed his critics, and went on the offensive against the inept and criminal administration of Cheney Rove & Bush. The last DNC had lots of hope and optimism, but not much teeth, but Barack was on the offensive tonight (without being overly negative) and I imagine Rove, his sidekick and McCain are 50% soiling themselves, 50% thinking of a swift boat plan. 

But aside the political context, it was a historical moment, and one I'll never forget. 

I'll also mention that I respect that John McCain gave Obama his night: it was rumored that he was going to announce his VP today. Historically, parties stay mainly quiet during the other party's convention. Of course, historically, parties don't set up attack offices in the city of the opponent's convention, but the Republicans have done that. I used to see John McCain as above the pettyness of the Republicans, but that pretty much ended four years ago at the RNC. Tonight's show of restraint, and the ad he put on the networks congratulating Obama was a rare glimpse of the class and honor that he used to have. And that is usually non-existent in his party. 

THANK YOU, HILARY

I'm not a political blogger, but after tonight's speech by Hilary Clinton, I felt inspiried to write something. I've been a Barack supporter all along, but I always respected her: I just didn't think she was "electable," thanks to nearly two decades of fools hating on her. I felt that she stayed in the race for too long, and almost damaged the party by doing so.

After tonight, all is forgiven. She gave the speech of her lifetime. She could have done less than she did. On a scale of 1 - 100, she scored a 200! She did everything right. Barack, you owe her.

Thank you Hilary Clinton.

SURF'S UP!

Earlier in this blog, I mentioned that I really wanted to learn to surf. Well, this weekend, I took my first steps: I took my first lesson in Long Beach, Long Island. Thanks to Elliot at Surf 2 Live, he was a cool teacher, and I plan to go back for more lessons (classes run through the end of October).

I wiped out a bunch of times, which I guess is normal, but when I did "get up," it was exhilarating. I can't wait to go back. I can totally see how this could end up being a lifestyle thing, and I only regret not trying this years ago. My wife took this picture of me, and many others - and she decided that when I go back next weekend, she's going to leave the camera at home and take a lesson too!

DOES IT EVER REALLY NEED TO CHANGE?

Last night, I woke up next to my sleeping wife, surrounded by two sleeping dogs and three cats. It was just one of those moments that you wish you could preserve forever. Can't it always be this way? Does it really need to change?

Of course, it didn't last: one of my cats, as she is prone to do, was bugging me about feeding her, hours before her breakfast time. I lured her and another cat out of our room, gave them a bit of food, and rushed back into the bedroom, closing the door and going back to sleep.

This morning, I woke again to their funny, muted complaints outside the door. I am on "stay-cation," so by this time it was a few hours past breakfast. I fed them, which woke up the dogs, who didn't just want food: they wanted to play. To avoid waking my wife, I took them into our backyard (yes, enclosed by a picket fence) and let them run and play as the beautiful sun was making its way into the sky. When they tired themselves out, I took them back in, they settled briefly into our room, where the cats where finding their spots for their next snoozes. Another perfect little moment. Until one of the dogs complained about not getting enough attention, so I lured her into another room.

I know this whole thing can sound a bit mundane, but noticing it and appreciating it is part of my effort to appreciate great moments as they are happening.

BE THANKFUL

I recently wrote about being thankful for my relationship with my wife. I was thinking about this earlier: I wouldn't consider myself to be an extraordinarily "gifted" person, but one thing I am definitely gifted with is the ability to appreciate what I have. And to enjoy the moment. I don't remember when I started being this way. 

I do remember, while I was in college during the Gulf War, seeing some senseless fight between two fraternities. One of them was a very jock, wrestling fraternity and the other was Pershing Rifles a fraternity for ROTC students. I was just struck by this particular conflict: I reckoned that most of the jock guys were very politically conservative and that they were mostly guys who were in favorite of the war. Yet, they were fighting the guys most likely to have to go. 

And, I thought, over what? What were these two groups fighting over? It may have been tensions from an intramural game, or just someone looked at someone else's girlfriend or something. In other words, they were fighting over nothing. Something about that really stuck with me, and I thought about how our country is at war, but it hardly effects anyone in our country. I thought maybe things might get worse for us at home, but I was going to appreciate my good fortune while I lived under very favorable conditions. 

Anyway, tonight I watched Neil Young's documentary of Crosby Stills Nash & Young's 2006 tour for Neil's Living With War album. It wasn't just about the tour, it was really about the emotional reaction to it. They did an actual fair, balanced job on the film, it wasn't just "Isn't CSNY great?" But you saw accounts of guys who were there, and people who had lost people to the war. It was extremely moving. 

Coincidentally, earlier in the day, I dropped off my wife at the airport: she's going to Africa for ten days. She does a trip like this every summer. I know the lump I get in my throat when she leaves. And I'll see her in less than two weeks! I can't imagine what the soldiers and their families go through. 

After I watched the film, I walked my dog. It was a beautiful night. I was really grateful for my life in general.